chef_du_jour
1 post
Jun 11, 2009
1:37 AM
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thanks kara for adding a little common sense to this "debate" i am the one who out of anger and frustration used the word and was very remorseful when i triggered one of our friends. I agree that the censoring of this word would be benefecial to all involved and can be useful to those needing to blow off the steam they have accumulated without offending anyone else in the room. Normally i am against any form of censorship but this sounds like a good practical solution for all involved. peace and love to all!
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shona
41 posts
Jun 11, 2009
6:35 AM
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I HATE THAT WORD!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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kelli
708 posts
Jun 11, 2009
7:54 AM
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hi kara, it was me who originally censored that word. i don't agree with censorship either, but that word triggers me and others, so i took it upon myself to ban it. well, all that did was succeed in turning it into a game to see who could get around the ban. they combined it with other words, spaced out the letters, and other things to outsmart the ban. so i thought, if its so important to them to be able to say that word, then i give up. i apologize to those who my decision has affected negatively. i myself was called that derogatory term on a constant basis by my stepfather, so it doesn't sit well with me to have to "hear" it here. but i cannot be a den mother to those who choose to be children. simple as that.
kelli
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souldoubt
81 posts
Jun 11, 2009
11:05 AM
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Would it be silly to think that people can get over "triggers"? i mean what if seeing the word and not reacting the same way actually changed how it made you feel? Personally i dont need to say that word and couldnt really care less about if it is banned or not. I dont use it that often as its a pretty offensive word. But if i knew a word or something triggered me and i could maybe work on changing that i think i would. Tax's and money and words like that trigger me into remembering my finances are fucked. But hearing it helps me attach new memories to it. Ban the word and it wont go away. Its like when a child falls and looks at you. If you dont react they wont either. If no one said anything about the word i bet it wouldnt be used nearly as often.
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aigiarm
56 posts
Jun 11, 2009
12:17 PM
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I agree with Soul. We cannot control what other people do or say. We can only control how we react. When we allow ourselves to be triggered by a word that someone else uses, we give that other person power over us. By the way, kelli, there is not a word bad enough to describe what your stepfather was (or is, if the scum sucking vermin is still alive.)
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icarus
243 posts
Jun 11, 2009
7:08 PM
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Christ it is a word. the only power it has is what you assign it. too many times these days words get the power over us. i will grant you it is a term meant to dehumanize you, but i would think the brain power here would get past that. guess i was wrong
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kelli
710 posts
Jun 11, 2009
8:09 PM
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the originator or this thread deleted her posts.....and i don't blame her. most of you are as much as saying "get over it". thats very understanding. (rolls eyes) i really doubt u would like it much if someone zeroed in on one of your sensitive issues, picked at it like an open sore, then told u to get over it when u were offended.
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kelli
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aigiarm
57 posts
Jun 11, 2009
9:39 PM
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Kelli, I think you misunderstood the intent of those of us who encouraged people who feel triggered to stop letting a word have so much power over them. We are trying to help you, not being insensitive to your feelings. I would never use that word when you or anyone else is in the room that I know gets triggered by it (I don't often use that word anyway.) Instead of snapping at us, why don't you give us the benefit of the doubt?
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kelli
711 posts
Jun 12, 2009
6:06 AM
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please forgive me
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kelli
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dish
56 posts
Jun 12, 2009
6:49 AM
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I didn't get the impression in kelli's post that she was "snapping" at anyone. She was merely making an observation, just as the rest of you are. This is obviously a "hot" issue with many people ~~ let's be careful not to place "blame" or "pressure" on one or two people and expect them to fix it.
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aigiarm
58 posts
Jun 12, 2009
9:20 AM
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I love you, kelli! I am truly sorry if anything I said offended you. You are an angel to be running this site and helping other people even while struggling with your own pain. Charlene
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Kara
80 posts
Jun 12, 2009
1:30 PM
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im was not trying to make this about kelli. i did not even know that kelli was a chatter that was offended by this word. i was in the room, and someone was offended by the word. i was merely wondering if we could change the word back to being "sensored" as to not hurt others. people don't even know the word is sensored when they use it anyway, why not protect other peoples feelings. if they use the C word, and feel their rights have been diminished, they could easily go to the next chat to offend. kelli, im not saying "get over it" (see above post) because i don't think anyone that is offended by that word should have to accept it. this is not about me, this is not about jane doe, this is about every person in chat that is offended by the word. (many men are also) i would be happy to see it sensored because i saw someone i know and like be offended when it was used, and it made me feel bad. drama queen aka Kara
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KrazyKaysta
26 posts
Jun 12, 2009
1:53 PM
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i too think it should be sensored just because we are a family, and familys have rules. and anyone who brakes those rules needs a time out (if they do it multipul times Ban the hell out of them Kelli!). Plus is just not nice. Its about feeling safe in our world. we have enough to worry about.
-Kay
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aigiarm
59 posts
Jun 12, 2009
2:36 PM
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Could we also ban the phrase "post nasal drip?" I always get triggered by it .
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souldoubt
82 posts
Jun 12, 2009
2:37 PM
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Yes we need more rules.
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dish
57 posts
Jun 12, 2009
5:26 PM
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this particular word is used to describe a woman in the most degrading, dirtiest, slimiest way possible. why in the world do does anyone want to subject anyone to it's use, even if it's not being directed toward a particular person. it's just plain, outright, vile.
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kelli
712 posts
Jun 12, 2009
5:33 PM
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bite me, dale......we have no rules. well...i take that back. the only rule is to try to be nice to others. kara, i never meant u were implying i or anyone else "get over it". i was empathizing with your original post (which u chose to delete). i agreed with you completely. i know it is a lot to ask, but i would like to see just a wee bit more class and sophistication here on occasion, instead of the constant barrage of raunch and crudity. guess i am just a prude. oh well.
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kelli
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Kara
81 posts
Jun 12, 2009
5:38 PM
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additional words on my list to be banned: rectify, moist, erected, and bulbous ugly words :)
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souldoubt
83 posts
Jun 12, 2009
10:37 PM
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After rectifying the problem caused by a moist, bulbous thingy we erected a sign with the C word on it! Ha
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ScubaChic
10 posts
Jun 13, 2009
2:15 PM
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Interesting posts to read...lots of reactions to the whole topic. But being the fact that I can't figure out what word you are talking about I can't give my opinion! LOL
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souldoubt
85 posts
Jun 13, 2009
8:11 PM
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you cant figure out what the C word is? duhhh its cucumber of course
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ozy
3 posts
Jun 16, 2009
12:40 PM
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30 years ago the word fuck lifted most eyebrows, now you might as well say sugar....cunt is running out of steam too, it wont be long before guests on letterman will greet him with "hi, you silly old cunt" and at the end of the day, its just a word, there are so many things in life to get angry/upset about, i dont understand why a word like cunt engenders so much hysteria. cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt CUNT !!!......man, i am such a cunt. ps.....pulling the gender card out doesnt work either, people have called people cocks, dicks, weeners etc for ever, our sexual organs name is used in a dispariging way also, and weve dealt with it, embraced it, like black guys call each other nigger, to suck the negative power out of the word......life is how we interpret it, if we dont want to be offended by words, maybe we need to consider them historically, socially etc.....then we can really see that they are just a bunch of letters constructed into words, they only have the power that we give them.....sincerely yours....ozy the cunt
Last Edited on 16-Jun-2009 12:51 PM
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winterman93
9 posts
Jun 16, 2009
8:01 PM
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just because we CAN say something, does not mean that we should...I am not for censorship more than anyone else...but there are things that can and ought to be avoided and treating one another with terms such as the C word is against why we are here at all. If it is a trigger for some people, then we should avoid it out of respect to those people. I swear, I am not perfect, but even that is a word that I don't use, there are just better ways/words to use....I am not better than anyone else because I choose not to use that word, I just figure that I can say pussy and that is as strong as it needs to be...it says all that needs be said and gets the point across just as well, but isn't a triggering word as the C word is...it isn't a nice word either....but it doesn't make women wince nearly as much and ultimately I think that the less offensive we are to women the better off we are in a public setting....which is where we are...if you want to say the C word, by all means do it to your hearts delight...but there is a time and a place...and here is neither. I don't say all of this to lecture to anyone but if we don't take care of one another....who will?
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aigiarm
61 posts
Jun 16, 2009
8:37 PM
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Good point, ozy, about the "n" word. That is why it raises my hackles when people try to impose "political correctness" on those of us who suffer from mental illness, ie: "Don't say I'm bipolar, say I'm a person with bipolar disorder." To which I reply, "You may be a person with bipolar disorder, but I'm a friggin' nutcase!" I will always SAY IT LOUD, SAY IT PROUD, PEOPLE! Lunatics, crazies, headcases...I am all of the above, and anybody that has a problem with it can just talk to my imaginary friend!
Last Edited on 16-Jun-2009 8:40 PM
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dish
60 posts
Jun 17, 2009
4:07 AM
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So what's your point? Is it a free for all then and to hell with anyone's feelings here and we call anyone any name in the book then? I thought we cared for each other here and respected each other. Or was I mistaken? Do we just throw disparaging words around regardless of how they hurt or sound, regardless of how they tear down a person. Do we not have more compassion than that? Is this not, first and foremost, a support room?
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souldoubt
86 posts
Jun 17, 2009
8:30 AM
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Dish i love ya babe. But personally i think that anyone that would use that kind of language against anyone in here is going to find a way to be insulting and hurtful with or without that word. I certainly would not use that word against anyone.
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aigiarm
63 posts
Jun 17, 2009
8:36 AM
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Allow me to clarify. I would never call anyone Else a name that they find offensive. What bothers me is when other people try to tell me what to call myself or try to intervene in other people's conversations to impose political correctness. In other words, you would be perfectly justified in being upset if I called You the "c" word, even if I was only joking. But if someone tries to jump in and tell me and ozy, for example, not to diss each other (which we both take a certain pervy delight in) then they need to mind their own business. This is not kindergarden. If someone is offended by language being used, they need to leave or use the iggy button, just like it says before anyone enters the website. Trolls are out there, in real life as well as in chat rooms, and we all need to learn how to defend ourselves against them rather than looking to an outside authority to protect our (sometimes oversensitive) feelings. The best thing to do when confronted with an abusive person is to realize that it is about them, not about you, take the high road, and just ignore them already.
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jommie
14 posts
Jun 17, 2009
12:14 PM
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i love the c word. its one of my faves. when this post first started i was itching to defend its use and say it. i'm so glad i shut my mouth and just listened for awhile. i don't care to use it now or to defend it and the freedom to use it. there are quite clearly a number of ppl here that are really upset and offended by this word. and i care more about not hurting those ppl than i do about using this word. so i'm out. no more c word from me.
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ozy
6 posts
Jun 17, 2009
4:24 PM
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if the world were organised around the supression of words or actions that may upset people, it would be a very limited world indeed..... also, is it possible that people who are offended by certain words, should take responsibility for their own limitations, their own deepseated problems with certain words, phrases, statements etc, for their own wellbeing and growth and the freedom of expression of others ? dish, btw, i expect that anyone reading these posts can deal with the word cunt, i dont use it in the room, i may have refered to g bush as a cunt, but i dont call others that in the room, so this here is different, were discussing ideas, and if anyone is upset by these posts, they only have themselves to blame, as they will have CHOSEN to continue reading.
ps.... i had to edit this post as i called karen an evil cunt yesterday in the room.....oops
Last Edited on 25-Jun-2009 3:45 PM
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E
20 posts
Jun 17, 2009
8:24 PM
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The "C" word is : Cake. It's a 4 letter C word. Cake wins (piss off pie)!
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purplet
107 posts
Jun 24, 2009
6:47 PM
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moist??
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souldoubt
89 posts
Jun 24, 2009
8:09 PM
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Cake is dry, pie is moist and yummy. Slime you chin with pie.mmmhmmmmmm
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mcLake
140 posts
Jun 25, 2009
4:46 AM
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Come On !!!! 32 posts on 1 word. Let's get real Folks.
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souldoubt
90 posts
Jun 25, 2009
4:54 PM
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Must be a popular word........
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